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Saturday, June 2, 2007

Choking up love


This poem I wrote in Nov 2006 describes a situation where a girl suppresses her love for her man even though she is free to express it, because she has her own problems in life (which we do not know: maybe a sick, dependent parent, maybe an impending job transfer, a marriage, etc.), though she knows she cannot forget him, come what may.


Upon her full cheeks falls
A sliver of rebellious hair,
She hears the calls,
But does not dare
Open her heavy lips
Or her heart to bare
The deep roots of a bond
That doesn't bend or break,
A love without a name,
Like an (unlikely) leaf resisting a harsh rake.
Upon her full cheek
Glows a single teardrop,
A surrender, not meek,
Of a love without a prop.


At the time I did not have the foggiest notion of what I was writing in terms of poetry, but later I came to know that I was kind of creating a terza rima, where the alternating lines rhyme, rather than the typical rhyming couplets or sonnets. If you would like to know more about rhymes in poetry (iambic pentameter, enjambment, etc.), read this page. If you remember, iambic pentameter found mention in Dan Brown's da Vinci Code. If you want, get an idea here.
All said and done, poetry is pretty complex stuff, and amateurs should write and bury the products deep inside a blog so no one can ever find out how silly one can be at times! But if you ever make Prime Minister or something, you can mint millions by selling these historic compositions.
One can almost see the Sotheby's guy with the gavel in his hand intone, "this incredible work of emotive poetry was the result of the poet suffering from severe prolapsed piles at the time". Well, if it ever comes to this point of human desperation that the Sotheby's chap talks of me, please show this post and SCREAM, "He did NOT suffer from piles, not ever, you liar!"

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

The poem was good....And the thought behind the girl's suffering was more enduring..

B. Ramana said...

@anonymous (same person gracing this blog or different ones?): thanks. yes, i think human beings are complex, and allow themselves to get into more complex situations because they do not question their value systems or their choices. hence, one should not look merely at the face of an event. still waters run deep.

Unknown said...

wish we who claim 2 b practicioners of literature could dabble in ur wares a little of the way u tread into ours! The morass of nihilism that much modern poetry has become needs some fresh blood free of complications like this. Cud I call this jibanmukhi!

B. Ramana said...

Aditi,
I am perennially poised, a humble savant, at the Aditus of Athena.
BTW: if my lil tricks with words land beneath your literary feet, the word 'aditus', like 'Aditi', means an entrance or beginning.
Athena, of course, was the Greek Goddess of Learning, like Minerva of the Romans.
Thank you for the kind words.

Anonymous said...

am no critic f poetry n undrstnd a very little abt it,yet i wud lik 2 knw hw come u cud masterfy a grl's complx emotion thru such a tough medium...u thot n wrote or u wrote n discoverd ur feminine side?
i wantd 2 post a commnt on ur other poem 2,but in didnt go thru...aniwes i wud lik 2 say d man in d above piece sud hve selective amnesia....rememberin n 4getin his ladylove wenevr he feels lik...true,d lady sud hav waitd,na?Dat is d only thng c can do or sud i say must do?